Friday, July 1, 2011

911 on my speed dial

I have a confession to make.  I am OBSESSED with that television show “19 Kids and Counting”… I know I know.  Poor Tony whenever he catches me watching or I tell him about something I saw on the show, his eyes widen and he starts kind of bouncing from foot to foot and he reminds me that children are expensive and making them is REALLY expensive. 

I am not 100% sure what it is about this show exactly.  I think it has something to do with appreciating some of their advice on raising kids.  I am not so keen on the reading the bible to the children all the time.  Don’t get me wrong, we will read cute little fictional stories to this baby, just not THOSE fictional stories.  Also, I am fascinated by the mom.  You just know she is either HIGHLY medicated, or is taking a few nips out of the flask she has hidden in “mommy’s special bible” when the cameras aren’t rolling.  I am just waiting for the episode where she is getting after one of her children in that little sing song voice of hers and just SNAPS and screams “Josh…Josi…Jack…WHATEVER THE HELL YOUR NAME IS GET OUT OF THAT @#%*&%$ TREE NOW!!!!”  

Today I was slightly late for work because the Duggers had me held captive and I just could not stop watching them and get moving.  As I sat trapped by their dark magic I learned something about myself.  One of the little girls on the show had fallen down and messed up her precious little face and needed stitches.  As I was watching the parents calmly take her to the Dr. and watch as the Dr. jabbed a giant needle into her little baby face and then sew her up, it occurred to me that I am in TROUBLE!  One day our little one will fall and break, slice, scratch, tear something on their little baby body.  On the show Michelle was saying that if the parents stay calm the kid will freak out less… RUH ROH!  I can just see it now I will be screaming at the top of my lungs “HELP!!  HELP!!  SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE!  I NEED A SURGEON/PARAMEDIC IMMEDIATELY!!!  THE BABY IS BLEEDING!” 

Thankfully Tony’s job requires frequent exposure to blood and guts, and he is trained in handling emergency situations.  I am a little more prone to taking the “Lets freak out because the sky is falling” approach to emergencies. 

Any suggestions for those of you that have lived through this trauma? 


  1. Although we don't have anything to share on the baby front just yet, we can at least confirm that we have lived through the trauma of being dragged in to the cult-like viewing that is the Duggers!!!! 'Highley medicated' is a description also used by us in the past for Mrs D, not quite sure how to describe Mr D.... he certainly does have a cult-like captivation and control over his family.... :)

  2. Haha, I can get wrapped up in the Duggars too, my husband thinks I am nuts.
    As far as trauma, my oldest fell when he was 18 months and gashed his head, around his eyebrow. I was freaking out, holding him to my chest, blood everywhere, wondering if I should call his Dad, my Mom or 911 first. After getting a washcloth on there, I looked again, 911 it was. They came and saved the day, my poor little guy got 6 (I think it was) stitches but was such a trooper about it. Everything went so fast I didn't get to call his Daddy until he was all stitched up. I had left the house with no keys, no cellphone, nothing but the two of us and my shirt splattered in blood. He survived and 10 year and 2 more kids later I have never had that big of an accident since *knock on wood*

  3. I should introduce you to my first set of intended fathers. One of them was cool as a cucumber and the other was the "OMG PANIC ABOUT EVERYTHING!" type. Thank goodness they evened each other out. :)

    In a way I know of admire the Duggars. They're just so darned organized. I don't know how they do it. Two overwhelm me most days.