Saturday, May 12, 2012

Mother's day

I was a pretty lucky kid growing up.  My mom was not perfect, but she was an incredible mother.  Which is pretty remarkable when you consider that she did not grow up with a great role model for parenthood.  Her mother died when she was 3 and her father was so overcome that he could not pull himself out of his own grief to be a parent to his children.   My uncle, aunt, and my mom raised each other.  Yet somehow, even though she was just a teenager when I was born and my father was not there, she became an incredible mom.  I grew up clothed, fed, sheltered, and most importantly I always felt loved and like I was the most special person in the world.  For the majority of my life it was just she and I  (My dad came into the picture much later).  She somehow was able to navigate being my best friend and also my moral compass.  We didn't have a lot of money, my mom worked hard, AND yet always had time to play with me and go on weekly adventures.  It is because of her that my biggest dream has always been to be a parent.  To pass on the love and guidance that she gave to me.  I went through some really dark years, a slave to drug addiction.  I was horrible to everyone who dared love me.  I was the most horrible to her.  I was absolutely not worth loving, and yet she did.  She never stopped.  And ultimately it was the love and support of my parents that allowed me to fight my way back.  My mother's love saved me.

Today when Tony tells me that I am "such an amazing Mama Bear" I know it is because I was shown how to be by her.  I am so grateful that I had such an incredible example of how to be a good parent.  My daughter gets to have this AMAZING woman to learn from, seek guidance from, and to be her best friend.  That's worth everything to me.  I love you mommy.  Thank you for everything.  There are not enough flowers on the planet for me to show you how much I love you. 

Happy Mother's Day to all of the MOMMIES, Daddies who are also the Mama Bear, and Single fathers who have to be both.  You are amazing!!!


  1. :-) love this post. I'm so worried I won't be as good a mom as mine was. It's a lot to live up to!!

  2. I've always said I wanted to be a father because I had great parents. I agree that our family experience can impact our desire to have our own. Glad you had a wonderful mom so you can be an amazing parent to Zoey.

  3. So so true! In my marriage we had both examples, how to be a great parent... and how NOT to. Unfortunately my mother, who happened to be a GREAT mother, is no longer with us. I hope somewhere she is noticing how much I am copying her :)

    1. I am sure she is and completely proud of the comapssionate amazing woman YOU have become because of her example and who you are.

  4. Well, that was a great post. My advantage in my family is that I got to be the last born...and so I learned a lot from my siblings...what to do...what not to do...but ultimately what allowed me to create a special relationship with my mother AND my father. I was extremely is Zoey and all her family. Thanks for sharing....and caring!