College Tours...

Our little tiny 11 week old baby decided to SHOOT across the floor during tummy time last night!!!  She got her knees under her and was GONE!  She couldn’t quite figure out her hands, but still she was MOBILE!  Is it horrible that I wanted to cry?  She also rolled over TWICE!  I think the little baby stage should last longer.  I am prepared to start a letter writing campaign.

How in the name of JANET JACKSON....

It happened.  I knew it was coming.  I could feel it in my bones for the past few days… a knowing… a dread.  And sure enough as I was washing dishes I heard it.  Zoey had been playing in her little princess swing so I turned to look and sure enough Zoey had the tell tale signs of a baby pooping.  Still nothing seemed a miss.  I figured I would give her a minute and then I would handle it.  Then the smell hit my nostrils and I whipped around realizing something was… different.  I picked Zoey up and thought “why is her back wet”…. You guessed it, my hand was covered in poop.

I rushed over to the DECON/CHANGING station and tried to assess the situation.  I could immediately tell as I unzipped her little Pjs that the diaper had not lived up to the hype of their commercials.  You know the one.  Cute little babies having a blow out contest?  I plan on suing.  It was everywhere. It was running down her leg, it was somehow on her stomach, everywhere.  I instinctually turned to yell for my mommy (as I always do when something gross occurs) and it hit me.  I’m the mommy!!!  I have to handle the yuck now!!   

Now Zoey is a kicker when she is being changed.  So I knew that this was going to be messy.  I decided to sacrifice the Pjs and onesie to the gods of poop and just cut it off.  This trick seemed to confuse Zoey and she thankfully kept her legs still while I removed her diaper… and then SPLAT!  She had the element of surprise on me.  I mean there was so MUCH poop, How could there be MORE?  Oh but there was more.  And I ended up cutting my own shirt off of me. 

The moral of this story… there is always more.

Oh and if you happen to be eating while reading this, you’re welcome!

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!!!

Gotcha...

Papa here.

Mike and I never set out to make a legal precedent out of Zoey.   But when our AMAZING attorney Phil told us that Washington State law allows two gay male parents to be on the birth certificate WITHOUT 2^nd parent adoption, we were stunned.    When our Surrogacy Contract was drafted, Mike and I were placed as the Intended Parents.   After Zoey was born, our Midwife filed for the birth certificate as soon as Zoey swam into our lives (she was a water birth).   What happened next would take two months to unravel….  The clerk at Vital Statistics said that neither one of us could be on the birth certificate.   We called our attorney Phil who then called Washington State Vital Statistics.   Round and Round it went, for weeks.   The state would not issue the birth certificate even though the law said we could.    It got kicked up to the Attorney General’s office, as they interpret the law for this agency.   They also said there was no “procedure” for putting two guys on a birth certificate.   Our amazing attorney proceeded to make his case to TWO Attorney’s General attorneys.    At long last, at 8 weeks, we had to go back to Megan for one last piece of paperwork.     With our last sheet of documentation, Washington State issued the first male/male birth certificate for a Surrogacy Contract.   Huge news.    It’s something we hope to share with others, as it’s only right that other can have their families the same way, with full rights and privileges.    Just like other parents……  

Something for the parent who goes back to work:

I came in from work the other day.   I walked in tired.     I got my verbal greetings from my family just inside the apartment where we live.  Being “dog tired”, I pushed off my boots.  When I rounded the corner, I was greeted by this blast of love that caught me off-guard.   Keep in mind I'm gone for a full day at a time (24hrs).    I know I miss them, but up in my head, for them it's not so bad.   Their lives go on, they have distractions, and I’ll be back when work is done.    But both of them were focused on me.    For the first time, Zoey's facial expression changed seeing me after so long.     She started to wave her arms, then kick her legs.     She made noises, she cooed.

Then it happened....She smiled.    She searched my face, my eyes.   And she smiled.  

I don't have the words to explain the rush.   Every stupid thing I was thinking about before I came through the door, my co-workers, City politics, in a single moment they were lost behind me in time.

I held Zoey for the next hour.     I couldn't put her down.    This little baby somehow missed me.    And it blew my mind.

A day later, getting up at 5 a.m. for the drive, to be gone another day, another 24 hours.    The apartment was quiet, both my babies asleep.     The door handle hurt my hand to turn; it took one thousand pounds of torque to turn the knob.   It hurts to leave them right now.

I was working the other night, and my "boss's boss" stopped me to congratulate me on the birth of the baby.      This guy is a big man, and in our work environment (paramilitary), he normally has to be quite stoic.   In this case, he told me about how it's important to "be there" for your kids.    He shared how his 18-year-old son was about to leave home.   He talked about how he said to his boy, "Son, I wish I could teach you more before you go...".    He then described how they cried together, as they knew his son’s time was coming to leave to move on independent in his own life.   It was very intimate to hear this big hulking man’s voice tremble as he described his son leaving.    I could envision in his mind’s eye the baby boy still in the crib.    I realized how there’s a brotherhood among men with kids, that I’d been welcomed inside, and I’m lucky to have someone share this experience.

I think I’ll go hold Zoey for a while…..

Dear Zoey (2months)

Dear Zoey,
You are 2 months old.  Wow… 2 months and it seems like you have always been here.  I think that is because you always have been.  In our hearts.  I want to thank you my baby princess, I want to thank you for every smile you give me.  It makes me laugh when I think about how quick you can go from full on screaming and crying, to laughing and smiling when I stick my tongue out at you.  I have never laughed so much in my whole life.  Every morning I look at you and thank the universe for allowing me to be your daddy.  It is absolutely the very best thing that has ever happened to me

 Brand new

 One month

2 month

Papa has recently gone back to work and you definitely know it.  You visibly miss him when he is gone, you look for him on the other end of the couch when it is just you and me.  And when he comes home after his 24 hour shift your face lights up, you get the biggest grin, you start cooing like crazy, and your arms and legs start kicking.  You can’t get into his arms fast enough.  Don’t tell anyone, but it brings tears to his eyes.  He misses you so much while he is working.

Every day since you have been here is better than the one before.  This journey is better than I ever could have imagined.  I love you my beautiful, important, smart daughter.

All my love,

Daddy

HAPPY 2 MONTHS ZOEY

 Look How cute I am!

 Papa makes the funniest faces

 I love my papa

 This is where Daddy and I walk every day.

On a walk with Daddy 

 8 weeks old

 My dads sure do look tired huh?

Daddy isn't pinching my ear, I swear.