tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58356540686114195132024-03-15T01:25:36.710-07:002 baby daddiesThe journey of TWO papa bears AND our Goldilocks.Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.comBlogger152125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-58332221620050030012012-12-09T11:36:00.004-08:002012-12-09T11:36:51.159-08:00HRH is ONE!!!!I know we have been horrible bloggers. I am hoping that when we get moved and settled that will change. What I feel the worst about is not blogging more about the twins. Its just hard with a TODDLER and packing. Also, even though I LOVE them so much and FEEL them in my heart, I am being a little cautious about it because its an adoption and I don't want to try and tell their birth mom's story on her since its not my story to tell. I will say this, they are healthy and moving and doing great. I can't wait for that moment when I have them in my arms. <br />
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So Zoey is ONE... which is AMAZING and also a little sad. Our pediatrician called her a TODDLER and for just a second I wanted to argue with her. I'm posting some pics from her princess party. It was absolutely perfect!<br />
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What an amazing day. </div>
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Zoey's princess dress! You can't really tell, but the skirt is all glitter and sparkles</div>
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Grandma;s girl</div>
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Wait lemme get this straight... Your letting me have SUGAR???</div>
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HOLY MOLY! Are all those presents FOR ME?!?</div>
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PRESENTS!!!</div>
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Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-64650077972779162652012-10-24T18:36:00.002-07:002012-10-24T18:36:39.954-07:00FALL IS HERE!!!Autumn is my FAVORITE time of the year! This year its even better because we have all of Zoey's first holidays coming up!!! I have been dreaming of the day when I could take my child trick or treating, it seems like a simple thing to most, but this is one of the moments I thought were lost to Tony and I. One of the 100 moments a day where I silently say a prayer of thanks for Megan and what she has given us. And now, miraculously, we get to do it all again next year!!!<br />
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I'm a little nervous about bringing home our two newest babies this winter. We have been trying to prepare Zoey for the new babies by loving on some of her stuffed animals etc and to show her "gentle". Normally Zoey is not easily distracted when she is playing with a toy, but man oh man let Tony or I pick up one of her "babies", hug it, and say "love the baby" and she crawls over at the speed of light, rips the offending item out of our arms, throws it, and then goes back to what she is doing. DOH! <br />
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We went to the pumpkin patch this weekend with Megan and her beautiful daughter! I have never been and Zoey LOVED it! To my absolute HORROR Zoey was most interested in the dirty goats!! Megan, who was holding her at the time, smirks at me and says "Well are you going to let her touch the goat?" What the hell? Its a special occasion!!!! (secretly I scrubbed her little hands down with hand sanitizer the second I had her alone JK JK). Here are some pictures of the trip.<br />
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Sisters!!!</div>
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Mama Megan and her daughter</div>
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The infamous goat</div>
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Zoey's first pumpkin!!!</div>
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I think she had a good time!</div>
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Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-68109499133523101972012-10-13T10:15:00.002-07:002012-10-13T10:15:53.583-07:00I just don't get it...I would literally give one of Tony's kidneys for someone to notice me yawn or rub my eyes, look at the clock, carry me up to bed, lay me down, and hand me a stuffed tigger and let me nap. This baby can be fussy as hell, yawn every 5 seconds, and constantly rub her eyes and will fight nap time with everything she has!!! LOL NOT FAIR I TELL YOU!!! NOT....FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-8183403659190633712012-10-07T09:10:00.000-07:002012-10-07T09:10:13.704-07:0010 months....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Our litttle princess is TEN MONTHS old!!!! Man oh man we are so incredibly blessed to be this baby's parents.</div>
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<br />Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-52773242288057305202012-10-06T19:39:00.004-07:002012-10-06T19:39:59.941-07:00So its a....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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OMG!!! Another princess and a SON!!! We are so over the moon!!!<br />
<br />Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-23756038768330542792012-10-03T19:31:00.002-07:002012-10-03T19:31:12.179-07:00Dear Babies...
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 200%;">Dear
Babies,<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Hi!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m your daddy and
I am so happy that you are coming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
have thought about and wished for you for so long.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Right now you have no idea what is going on
around you, but your Papa and I are frantically trying to get ready for your
arrival.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your Papa… you both are going
to love him so much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is so incredible
and judging by how happy your sister Zoey is when she is pulling on his chest
hair he is a great jungle gym.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
strongly encourage you both to grab a fistful of his fur and yank often.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As for me I am just going to love you both
every day of my life with all that I am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We get to see you on the ultrasound tomorrow and even though it will be
months before I see your faces, kiss your cheeks, and count your toes I cannot
wait to see your little images on that screen. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Until then my babies sleep well.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">I love you,<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Daddy<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-68597526400766102152012-10-03T19:19:00.001-07:002012-10-03T19:19:14.306-07:00Chosen
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">I have been thinking about this blog post for days and
days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I cannot believe the journey we
have been on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I cannot believe that we
are on the precipice of becoming fathers again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Even though I am as thrilled about these
babies as I was Zoey there has also been hesitation about being all in
considering the circumstances.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our joy
is all because there is a woman who is in an impossible situation and has to make
an impossible choice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As elated as
we are that Zoey is going to have siblings and that we will have 2 more babies
to love, Tony and I are also incredibly sad for the choice she has to
make.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not going to blog about her or
her situation, that’s not my story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
I will say that from the very second I met her I liked her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She has a strength that I envy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You see that pretty much as soon as you meet her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></b><br />
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">I know that anything can happen on this journey, and I could
get caught up in being cautious... OR I can revel in our joy and shout my
gratitude to the universe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have chosen
the latter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One of the greatest blessing
about keeping a blog of Zoey’s pregnancy and after is that we have something to
show her later.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These babies are already
a part of our family and our hearts and we love them fiercely.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So tomorrow we find out the gender(s) and I
am like a kid the night before Christmas, my brain is vibrating and I can’t sit
he reality is it doesn’t matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just
can’t wait to see them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To know that
they are alright.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I am nervous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am nervous for the woman who is carrying
her babies and trying her hardest to be strong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I pray God shows me how to support her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-64221890250217737842012-09-24T14:28:00.001-07:002012-09-24T14:28:34.030-07:00Watch out Duggars...HERE COME THE Hurleys!!! We are super excited to announce that it looks like baby #2 and baby#3 are on their way! This will be a very different and equally exciting situation. We are adopting this go round and have been matched with an amazing birth mom. We know that anything can happen in this situation and are remaining cautious... actually that is a big fat lie. We are so over the moon and excited that we can barely sit still. And yes a little terrified, but ultimately we are in LOVE with these babies already. I will post more later!!!Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-68695260228308874362012-09-04T13:49:00.003-07:002012-09-04T13:51:52.469-07:009 monthsI can't believe our little Zozo is NINE months old. She is absolutely amazing and we just stare and stare at her. Evey little accomplishment is amazing to watch her figure out. She has decided that crawling is boring and would prefer to just roll everywhere. And that kid can roll across the parlor and living room before you finish sneezing. She has also inherited some of Tony's less endearing qualities. I am referring to her complete stubborness. Whether it is changing her diaper, or her clothes, or even feeding her, if she doesn't want to do it she is not going to make it easy. She also can't seem to get her clothes in the hamper either... JUST like her Papa. SHE at least has an excuse. I love them both though and have decided to keep them.<br />
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We went to the park to celebrate her 9 month "birthday". We live in a pretty progressive city and there were plenty of the gays at the park. Even other gay families. We DO tend to get the strangest looks from other "bear" types. It is a phenomenon I have noticed lately. Probably because I am so butch and they can't figure it all out.<br />
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She is absolutely Papa's girl.</div>
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I LOVE those cheeks!</div>
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She REFUSES to wear shoes or even socks, another thing she gets from her Mississippi roots (cough Tony)</div>
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Celebrating her 9 months!</div>
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Not quite sure how she feels about the teeter totter.</div>
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In OTHER news we have started talking about child number 2. We're not quite sure how that is going to work out yet, but we would both LOVE to add another kid to our family. We live in a state where surrogacy is only okay if there is no money exchanged (stupid) so more will be revealed. Maybe adoption? Hey are cabbage patch kids still a thing?</div>
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Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-85048229463860868492012-08-12T11:44:00.001-07:002012-08-12T19:54:05.553-07:00Kicking the old school<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">The “Old school moms” God
love them… because it is still illegal to shoot them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These are the moms who haven’t raised
children since Jesus was a wee lad, but never the less know that what you are
doing is just wrong and will eventually result in the decay of civilization as
we know it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can usually spot them
because they seem like harmless old ladies who just want to smile at your
precious little baby.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>DO NOT FALL FOR
THIS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>RUN!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Kick her walker out from under her, throw a
can of formula at her, release the emergency brake on her wheelchair and give it a little shove, do whatever it takes to get away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Trust me, you will thank me later.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">But what about those “old
school moms” you’re related to?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have
very little to say about them since I am fortunate enough to not have anyone in
my family or circle of friends who feel the need to berate me with their
antiquated advice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I asked a… friend,
yeah a friend (You don’t know him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
lives in Canada and we met at camp), to help me with this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Here are some of the gems
we…. I mean my FRIEND… has endured:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">OSM: </span></b><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You spend HOW much on
formula?!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You know in my day we used to
just mix a little caro syrup and milk and THAT was formula.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My kids turned out <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">JUST FINE </b>(note: I hate any statement that ends with my kids turned
out just fine).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">ME:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></b>Cool.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now tell me that part about Uncle Julio
needing to chow down on a roll of Tums before he drinks water again?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">OSM:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">You know in MY day we used
to dab a little whiskey on the baby’s gums for teething, and my kids turned out
JUST FINE<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>ME: </b>What a GREAT suggestion!!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hear your son just got his 6 month AA
chip!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please express my congrats!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">OSM: </span></b><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You guys hold that baby
too much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You really should let her
cry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You’re going to spoil her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">ME: </b>You
may be right!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was just reading in
Parent magazine about how moms of older kids wished they had held and cuddled
their babies LESS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And don’t even get me
started on those babies that robbed that liquor store!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">OSM:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></b><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">You know that cat will
steal your baby’s breath while she sleeps, and if you leave the dog alone with
her he will eat her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>(<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">It is important to note that we have neither
a dog nor a cat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just refuse to clean
the house, and since Tony so selfishly objected to being the scapegoat I needed
to blame the dirt and smell on something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So Fido and Fluffy are merely figments of our imagination and therefore
I have no idea if this is actually true or not.</i>)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Now, if you’re like me
(and I assume you at least aspire to be) you might be tempted to pull out the
files of data and empirical research you have painstakingly poured over to prove
why you are right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Trust me don’t waste
your time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The thing about the OSMs is
that you will never be able to convince them that things have changed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are content to knit, while watching
Murder She Wrote , and to tell anyone who will listen how you are messing up
your child, and possibly society as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It just is what it is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">So as a Certified Expert
Parent (CEP) here is my prayer for the day:<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Dear God, Buddha, Allah,
the Dali Lama, and/or Janet Jackson,<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">You willing Zoey will
choose to bless us with a plethora of grandbabies some day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At some point she will tell me how she just
must have the Swedish, organic, hyper barometric chamber for her little
one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please tear out my tongue should I
berate her with how she slept in a plain old crib and turned out <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">JUST FINE.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></b>Instead give me the strength to smile, hug her, and then sell
my…err… Tony’s plasma to make sure she has the best one available. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Amen, AHHMEN, or whatever<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12pt;">Disclaimer: Since my friend
lives in Canada he doesn’t care if you sue him for slander. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-84508517409571070902012-08-09T08:43:00.001-07:002012-08-09T08:43:02.115-07:008 months old!Our baby is 8 months old!!! Time really does fly!<br />
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Zoey and Mama Megan!</div>
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CHUCK E CHEESE! </div>
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Swimming!</div>
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Well now that our baby is 8 months old I like to think of myself as something of a child rearing expert… I could barely keep a straight face as I typed that. No, I am definitely no expert on babies. What I have become an expert on is what I call the “smile, nod, and redirect”. It seems that NOTHING makes people want to share their opinions more than babies. This is where the “smile, nod, and redirect” comes in handy. Everyone from Grandmothers, to best friends (WITHOUT children), to nosey old ladies at the grocery store have opinions they cannot wait to share with you about what you SHOULD be doing with YOUR baby. This drives me BONKERS I must admit. But ever since I have mastered the smile, nod and redirect life has become much simpler. Here are a few examples:<br />
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1) <b>NOSEY PERSON: </b>So you’re going with a less aggressive vaccination schedule? Well ya know you really should blah blah blah blah. <b>RESPONSE</b>: Smile, nod and say that is an excellent point, thank GOD you have intervened! Say, why is your husband spending so much time talking to the cute waitress? How long DOES it take to order coffee? (redirect).<br />
2) <b>NOSEY PERSON:</b>You know your baby wouldn’t be so clingy if you just blah blah blah blah. <b>RESPONSE</b>: Smile, nod, and say I hadn’t really thought of that, thank you for saving our child from growing up to be a serial killer! Say, isn’t that YOUR little angel showing his winky to those little girls for a cookie? (redirect)<br />
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I think what I have realized is that MOST of the time parents really want to validate their choices, and prove that what THEY decided was the right thing. Nothing supports my hypothesis better than the “day care moms”. Look, let me first say that I think that WHATEVER choices you make when raising your children are the right ones, as long as they don’t involve the use of duct tape and Benadryl as a babysitter. We do the best we can for our babies and have to make the choices that benefit our families. The MAJORITY of people we know have fully supported and even applauded the fact that we decided to have one parent stay home for a year or two with Zoey. Then there are the “daycare moms” this is a very specific sub group of parents that are SO aggressive about the benefits of daycare that they try as hard as possible to convince you that you should run back to work and drop your kid off at the local Pee Wee play hut. They like to tell me every single time I see them why they are so happy and thrilled with their choice. These are also the parents that want to play the “development game”. I hate to admit it, but THIS is a trap I HAVE fallen into. If you are a new parent and someone tries to rope you into the “development game” trust me, hold up one hand, turn your head, roll your eyes, and say “Homey don’t play that bitch”. They will usually brag about some new milestone their child has completed, and then follow it up with a snide remark about your poor abused stay at home baby. For example:<br />
<br />
1)<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><b>BRAG: </b>Well you know little Apple was reading to at age 6 months. We couldn’t actually hear her, and she was holding the book upside down while chewing on it, but that just shows that she is a tactile learner. I owe it all to daycare. <b>SNIDE COMMENT: </b>Oh? Zoey isn’t speaking in complete sentences yet?!? I'm sure it will happen any day. Probably nothing to rush out and have her tested for or anything. <br />
2)<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><b>BRAG: </b>The reason little Daquan is so social is because he is in daycare. You know his teacher says that during play time he passes out all the toys and makes sure that everyone is having a great time! Why the other day he grabbed the snack tray and started passing out crackers to all his little friends. We are so proud of our 3 month old. Thank god for Daycare! <b>SNIDE COMMENT: </b>So your telling me that Zoey hasn't mastered the sitting Indian style while stacking her blocks alphabetically by color and shape and reciting Shakespeare yet?!? Well babies develop at different speeds, I'm sure everything is fine.<br />
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Here is what I have figured out about this particular subset of working parents… are you ready? They really either feel guilty for wanting to work or wish they were home with their kids. They want to blow your candle out so theirs will burn brighter. And look I get it, staying home with a baby 24 hours a day, 7 days a week is not for everybody. It is OKAY if going back to work makes you a better parent, or if your family needs your income. I know you’re doing the best you can and I applaud you for doing it! Believe me there are days when I think "hmmmm I wonder how the world of social services is even making it without me". But ultimately I wouldn’t change a single thing about my life as a stay at home dad. This is what is right for our family right now. And that is all that matters. The only group worse than the "day care moms" are the "Old school moms", but more about them later. As a Certified Expert Parent (or CEP as I like to call it) here is my prayer for the week.<br />
<br />
Dear Lord, Buddha, Allah, the Dali Lama, and/or Oprah,<br />
<br />
Inevitably one day I will witness a new parent changing their baby’s diaper/ breast feeding/ formula feeding/ potty training/ etc. They will be doing it differently than I would, and therefore it will be wrong, BUT if I should open my mouth to criticize them please tear out my tongue. Instead give me the wisdom to smile and tell them what an amazing job they are doing and assure them that their baby is incredibly lucky to have them. Because this gig is hard enough without me subjecting them to my advice.<br />
<br />
Amen/ AHHmen/ Whatever<br />
<br />
<br />
DISCLAIMER: The scenarios in this post are fictional, any similarities to actual stupid advice or comments we have received is purely coincidental, and therefore not liable.<br />
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<br /></div>Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-86485460932362197752012-07-07T14:27:00.000-07:002012-07-07T14:27:09.961-07:007 months old!!!In so many ways Tony and I can't believe that we have been parents to this incredible being for 7 months. It seems like just yesterday I was holding her for the first time. She has grown into such a little ham and everyday is a new adventure with her. I thank the creator everyday for choosing us to be her parents, and for making women like Megan who are so giving and so compassionate as to be willing to create families for other people. <br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-MlEugcZ6GJs/T_ipBrITOVI/AAAAAAAAANk/GlS7-5_2WLg/s1600/IMG_1919.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-MlEugcZ6GJs/T_ipBrITOVI/AAAAAAAAANk/GlS7-5_2WLg/s320/IMG_1919.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-57861684451997845912012-06-30T09:17:00.001-07:002012-06-30T11:16:14.405-07:007 years out of hellI have heard it said that it takes 7 years for every cell in your body to replace itself. So what that means is that in just a few days I will be a completely different person. My first date of sobriety was July 11, 2005. Before that day I spent the majority of my life under the influence of Crystal Meth, alcohol, and/or any number of chemicals. So this is a very special "birthday" for me. <br />
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I still cringe when I think about who I was back then. It seems a million years ago since I had to wake up and stick a needle in my arm to get out of bed. It seems like an eternity since I had to degrade myself and everyone I knew in order to get high. And yet I know that if I am not on my game, and if I let my program slip, I could be back there in an instant. I stole, I lied, I was cruel... I was so cruel to my family and anyone that DARED to love me. I just knew that I was a lost cause. For me active addiction was like what I think being possessed is like. There was this piece of me that could see what I was doing, who I was hurting, what I was putting myself and my family through and I wept, but couldn't stop. COULD NOT stop. I remember there would be days (when I was still able to hold a job) that I would get paid and tell myself all day at work that I am going to pay my bills, I will not get high today. I would literally be in tears as I pulled into my dealers parking lot. I would sit in my car and SCREAM at myself, pound my fists on the steering wheel, and plead with God to not allow me to go up those stairs. Inevitably I would walk through that door and it would all start over again. It took nothing for me to fly into violent rages. I used up people like they were nothing. I took my family emotionally hostage and was powerless to change.<br />
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Then one day I found myself in the seediest of motels, strung out, suicidal and done. That is the day Sandra Bullock saved my life. Yes you read that correctly. When I say seediest of motels I mean it. You know the kind where the lock on the door barely works, the carpet has mold growing in it, the lamp shades have been stolen or removed so the light is bright and hideous, and the comforter... well lets just say I layed on a garbage bag on top of the bed. I had decided that the kindsest thing I could do for my mother was to commit suicide, but I needed to get high one more time. My cellphone rang and I snatched it up praying it was my dealer, it was not. It was my mother, we fought and I threw the phone on the bed and it hit the remote. The TV came on and as I crumbled to the floor I started mindlessly watching. Sandra Bullock was talking to a man and she was ringing her hands. She was describing her withdrawal symptoms. It was the movie 28 days. That was the first time it occured to me maybe there was a different way. It took me a few weeks, but on July 10, 2005 I stuck the last needle in my vein, took the last hit/pill/drink/snort and then begged my family, the family I had abused for years to help me. My mom and dad stayed with me while I went through detox, the most horrible pain and sickness you can imagine. 7 days they took turns caring for me while my body tried to purge the poison from itself. Then came rehab. The first time I ever saw my dad cry was the day I "graduated" from treatment. <br />
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I was introduced to AA and NA while in rehab and those programs have been what has changed me. I no longer lie and cheat and steal. I no longer fly into rages. I have been given tools that alllow me to love, and have compassion and empathy. These recovering junkies, drunks, garbage cans, criminals they have taught me how to be a better person. The person that my parents raised me to be. I love them like a soldier loves his or her platoon. Because make no mistake addiction is war.<br />
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Because of this new life I went to school and became, first a drug and alcohol counselor, and then back to school to become a social worker/mental health counselor. I repaired my relationships, I get to make a living amends to the people I have hurt. I met and married the love of my life a man I still don't know what I did to deserve. And I get to be a dad to the most amazing child. <br />
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It was Zoey that inspired this post. This morning she was sitting on my lap and she was playing with my forearms. I realized as she patted my arms and played with my arm hair that these are the same arms that used to be littered with track marks. These arms used to be the size of my wrist and ached from the daily stabbings they endured. These arms now get to hold my child and protect her. They get to hug my husband and my mom. These arms never again get to be used to hurt anyone ever.<br />
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I am not writing this to toot my own horn. As I approach 7 years clean and sober I just needed to get all this out I guess. And I know that many families are being torn apart by addiction. I hope that this post allows someone to have hope. Please hate the addiction, but love your addict. <br />
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I know this was heavy and if you made it to the end, thank you for reading this and listening.Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-69629054058295614802012-06-23T20:38:00.001-07:002012-06-23T20:38:33.089-07:00HORRIBLE BLOGGERWe have been TERRIBLE about keeping up the blog and I am so sorry! I wanted to share Zoey's 6 month pics with you guys and I PROMISE to catch you guys uo soon! I also need to catch uo on whats been happening with you guys. <br />
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The photographer caught this one while we were "on a break". It's my favorite.</div>
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Grandma, Grandpa, and Zoey</div>
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Another "break" one that I LOVE.</div>
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The only thing that would make this one better is if Tony's parents could be in it too.</div>
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</div>Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-52497763123212194992012-05-27T09:34:00.000-07:002012-05-27T09:34:51.022-07:00Almost 6 months old...My Dearest Zoey,<br />
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You are almost 6 months old, and every night I think to myself as I lay you down in your crib that it is impossible to love you more than I do right then. Inevitably the next morning as I pull you into my arms I realize I do. Every single day I love you more than I could have ever imagined. My whole life has changed. Tragic news stories about a missing child, or something terrible happening to a young woman grip my heart with terror. Commercials about fathers and daughters bring me to tears. I am aware of my surroundings with animal like instincts when you are with me. Things I never paid attention to before I notice. Your safety and well being is my major concern all the time. And I love it. <br />
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As you transition from a infant to a baby I am in constant amazement by you. Every day you learn something new, you change, you grow. And every day I am more and more proud of you. You currently are going through a "stranger danger" phase, where you really only want to be held by your Papa or I. Even when people you know are holding you one of us has to be close and in your sight for you to know you're safe. Part of me cringes and wants the person holding you to have a good experience, but the other part is so overwhelmed and proud that Tony and I are your safe place. That we are doing a good a job and that you know we will always give everything we have to keep you protected.<br />
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I am constantly emailing your pediatrician to ask about the plethora of things I have found on the internet about what I should be doing for, with, or to you to ensure that you are getting the best of everything. I am incredibly grateful that we are fortunate enough that I can take this time to stay home with and take care of you. Your Papa works so hard to make sure that we are all taken care of so amazingly. I hope that you find a partner just like him some day. That loves you and your family the way he loves and cares for us. He really is incredible and the both of you are my entire heart.<br />
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I love you Zoey,<br />
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Daddy.Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-74328723187387743622012-05-17T07:40:00.001-07:002012-05-17T07:40:42.577-07:00Our baby...NEVER sleeps!!! Okay that might be a slight fabrication. She is just in this phase where she won't sleep at night. The last SEVERAL nights Zoey wants to be in bed with us. The fact that her crib is in our room is just not cutting it for her. This makes for a VERY tired daddy and Papa. It is ONLY 7:30 and I can barely wait for her first nap so I can lay down with her (something they tell you to do, but I am not very good at). Is it too soon to slip Lunesta in her bottle? I love that one of our older friends suggested a little bit of whiskey in her bottle "It worked for our kids"... yeah I'm thinking that was pre CPS. No matter how hard I look I can't seem to find that suggestion in any of our baby books so we're going to skip that little gem of advice. Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-36791091426567883712012-05-15T19:17:00.001-07:002012-05-15T19:17:19.436-07:00MAN OH MAN I love this baby...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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She thinks her Daddy is HILARIOUS (clearly she has good taste besides being adorable, brilliant, and AMAZING)</div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QdRvUD87vEQ/T7MN6aaIZNI/AAAAAAAAAKo/lYOqxuDDLqA/s1600/Zoey+5+months+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QdRvUD87vEQ/T7MN6aaIZNI/AAAAAAAAAKo/lYOqxuDDLqA/s320/Zoey+5+months+2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-5178255341821172972012-05-13T11:28:00.001-07:002012-05-13T11:28:12.316-07:00Looking for THEIR baby...Is anybody else just DYING to hear that Doug and Bill over at <a href="http://dougandbill.blogspot.com/">Looking for baby</a> have welcomed their little girl into the world?!? Or am I the only one obsessively stalking their blog?Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-74063757823472831812012-05-12T19:36:00.001-07:002012-05-12T19:36:44.843-07:00Spoiler alert... there will be gushing.So Tony and I celebrated our anniversary last week. I have to be honest and say that I am completely spoiled. He pulls out all the stops, surprises, and romance for these type pf things. We went up to Salish Lodge and Spa for the night. Upon arriving there were roses in our room and we were literally directly over looking a gorgeous water fall. I was immediately sent up to the spa for one hour of bliss while my husband tended to our baby. It was an amazing night. The thing is I can still remember exactly how I felt the first time I saw him. The butterflies in my stomach felt more like a flock of birds, my hands were sweating, and I could barely look at him much less speak to him. I knew immediately that something was different. Being the type of guy who was not at all interested in relationships, I avoided any situation which I might run into him again. Then one day he showed up at my best friends house for a party and I spent the entire day avoiding whatever area he was in, while at the same time talking mad shit to my friends about what I would to him etc. Then as I was leaving he asked if he could walk me to my car. As I opened my mouth to give him any one of the plethora of excuses I had in my head, we made eye contact and all I could say was Yes. I am so glad I did. So here we are. And he still makes my stomach do sommersaults. The touch of his hand still causes my heart to flutter. And best of all I get to witness our daughter fall more in love with him every day. I love to just watch him with her. The sight of my giant bear of a husband turn to mush when she smiles melts me. I am truly incredibly grateful for you Tony. Everything you are. I love you with all of me... even when you step out of line (JK JK JK). Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-39070565612573544522012-05-12T08:17:00.002-07:002012-05-12T08:19:33.614-07:00Mother's dayI was a pretty lucky kid growing up. My mom was not perfect, but she was an incredible mother. Which is pretty remarkable when you consider that she did not grow up with a great role model for parenthood. Her mother died when she was 3 and her father was so overcome that he could not pull himself out of his own grief to be a parent to his children. My uncle, aunt, and my mom raised each other. Yet somehow, even though she was just a teenager when I was born and my father was not there, she became an incredible mom. I grew up clothed, fed, sheltered, and most importantly I always felt loved and like I was the most special person in the world. For the majority of my life it was just she and I (My dad came into the picture much later). She somehow was able to navigate being my best friend and also my moral compass. We didn't have a lot of money, my mom worked hard, AND yet always had time to play with me and go on weekly adventures. It is because of her that my biggest dream has always been to be a parent. To pass on the love and guidance that she gave to me. I went through some really dark years, a slave to drug addiction. I was horrible to everyone who dared love me. I was the most horrible to her. I was absolutely not worth loving, and yet she did. She never stopped. And ultimately it was the love and support of my parents that allowed me to fight my way back. My mother's love saved me.<br />
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Today when Tony tells me that I am "such an amazing Mama Bear" I know it is because I was shown how to be by her. I am so grateful that I had such an incredible example of how to be a good parent. My daughter gets to have this AMAZING woman to learn from, seek guidance from, and to be her best friend. That's worth everything to me. I love you mommy. Thank you for everything. There are not enough flowers on the planet for me to show you how much I love you. <br />
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Happy Mother's Day to all of the MOMMIES, Daddies who are also the Mama Bear, and Single fathers who have to be both. You are amazing!!!Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-81338809956659371132012-05-09T20:42:00.001-07:002012-05-09T20:42:27.765-07:00For Jeni...Here are some pics of HRH.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-AnAGINLvyQ4/T6s5AHJz4UI/AAAAAAAAAKU/OFmIPgp5oW8/s1600/daddy+and+Zoey.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-AnAGINLvyQ4/T6s5AHJz4UI/AAAAAAAAAKU/OFmIPgp5oW8/s320/daddy+and+Zoey.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-76229639447667708432012-05-08T11:14:00.001-07:002012-05-08T11:14:13.294-07:00Mother's dayOkay... so Tony and I have decided to break up Mother's day and Father's day. Since I am the one that is home with the baby and make her schedule (YEAH RIGHT!) and am the one to be covered in spit up, poop, and pee MOST often (not that Tony isn't USUALLY covered in one or more of Zoey's bodily fluids, but he gets to go to work LOL) I will get Mother's day. What this REALLY means is that IIIIII GET TO GO FIRST!!!! Some of our friends have teased me, as if I am somehow forgoing my male/daddy/testosterone by celebrating Mother's day. I am THRILLED to be the mama bear in this house. I am so incredibly grateful to be able to see all the changes in our little girl, to see her smile first thing every morning, to be her "mommy". With Tony's unique work schedule we are both very fortunate that Zoey gets so much time with the both of us. Currently she is in the phase where she really only wants one of us to hold her or comfort her. Secretly I love this, and at the same time I fear we aren't doing something right. I know that grandparents, uncles, aunts, and god parents all want to be special to her, and I am sure they are. Sometimes though I wish people would calm down and just let her be the baby she is without trying to figure out her every mood. AND we are absolutely blessed to have so many people who love her so much and care so much about her. Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-46253011221162990632012-05-07T22:44:00.001-07:002012-05-07T22:44:11.188-07:00WHERE ARE ALL THE BLOGS I'M FOLLOWING?!They are all just GONE from my list! Does anyone have a suggestion?!? I will just DIE if I can't cyber stalk you guys!!!!Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835654068611419513.post-28639569254132301412012-04-13T10:25:00.005-07:002012-04-13T10:56:42.956-07:00FOUR MONTH PHOTO SHOOT<div><div><div><div><div><div><div><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-sRI0A9yJ1uE/T4hiOzmV1uI/AAAAAAAAAIc/yPc9JuluqqI/s1600/img_0013.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 214px; height: 320px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730938532337669858" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-sRI0A9yJ1uE/T4hiOzmV1uI/AAAAAAAAAIc/yPc9JuluqqI/s320/img_0013.jpg" /></a></div><div> </div><div> </div><div><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 214px; height: 320px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730938536683321042" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-HAecGAyW2BA/T4hiPDybNtI/AAAAAAAAAIo/unQyyEGzN18/s320/img_0016.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div> <img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 320px; height: 214px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730939813238230866" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-33ZXkXx-RnE/T4hjZXU1T1I/AAAAAAAAAI0/jmymlgTAE9I/s320/img_0020.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div> <img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 320px; height: 214px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730939819602455490" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-aEMJzd6mfB0/T4hjZvCLq8I/AAAAAAAAAJA/SVnHhIIcR78/s320/img_0021.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div> <img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 320px; height: 214px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730940570145568258" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-qvjzx86lGxQ/T4hkFbBmtgI/AAAAAAAAAJc/TNkoZJzQvKA/s320/img_0004.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div> <img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 320px; height: 214px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730940559116752706" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-H_kqWLDZ_nM/T4hkEx8IV0I/AAAAAAAAAJM/wtglOsWcEDw/s320/img_0003.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div> <img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 214px; height: 320px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730945181531886386" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-7Z3Ur0fsFU8/T4hoR1xx0zI/AAAAAAAAAJk/Nz2jv7U_k8E/s320/img_0026.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div> </div><div> <img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; width: 320px; height: 214px; text-align: center; display: block; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5730945191929511442" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-f_BuWEIcRHA/T4hoScgw_hI/AAAAAAAAAJw/YaPff5PERC0/s320/img_0009.jpg" /></div><div> </div><div><br /><div></div></div></div></div></div><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p></div></div></div></div>Mike and Tonyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13190143427416386769noreply@blogger.com17